Grief is a tricky thing. It ebbs and it flows, but it never really goes. Death really stinks. I wish we didn’t have to deal with it, but we do. So how do we help our loved ones deal with the loss of a parent, spouse, or child?

As a pastor here is my list of the three strategies that help me minister to the grieving.

1) Just be there! Don’t think you have to say much of anything. It means so much to sit (and maybe even cry) with those who are grieving. LISTEN and don’t be afraid of silence.

2) When the time is right ask if you can share Scripture. The Psalms are wonderful. Psalm 23, 40, 54, 55, and 121 are a few of my favorites. Romans 8 is wonderful. I Corinthians 15 gives tells us quite vividly that a better Day will come when Jesus returns to raise the dead to eternal life with our awesome God. Scripture is powerful – use it!

3) Pray for your friend who is grieving. You can pray privately, but also pray in the company of your friend. Speak to God honestly about the pain and grief that is present, but then extol how God is faithful to His promise to never leave us nor forsake us. Not even death can seperate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.

Now I can’t guarantee that if you implement these three strategies that our loved ones will get over their grief. Grief is tricky and it may never fully go away. We miss those whom we’ve lost to death. What I can guarantee is that EVEN IN THE MIDST OF GRIEF your loved one will hear about the hope and peace that only comes through faith in our crucified and risen Lord and Savior, Jesus!

Blessings to you as you care for the grieving.

IN CHRIST,
Pastor Tim Ahlman